In New York City, detective Luigi Mackeroni investigates a string of mysterious penile mutilations at the Hotel Quickie. After Mackeroni attempts to have a tryst with a gigolo he meets in the lobby, a carniverous condom bites off his right testicle and flees, which sets the detective off on a quest to stop the predatory prophylactic once and for all.
Honeymooning couple Monica and Mike check into a motel in New Mexico. All seems normal until an ambulance pulls up and abducts Mike. Monica narrowly escapes and, with the help of truck driver Bill, discovers the awful secret of the motel and the ambulance service.